Toby Tells by Toby Nomad

Toby Tells by LF Gillis

Toby Tells

Toby Tells: The Rise and Downfall of The Hagensville Maphia and More

” is a politically incorrect collection of short stories. The cover title is about what happens when big city crime ideas come to a backwoods town.

A bunch people plot to form their own mafia around a bonfire. The local sheriff’s son, Emitt Emerson, proclaims himself the Godfather. Emitt takes it upon himself to decide who is going to do what.  Emitt forgets about one person, Toby.
Toby tells his story to the feds, and they raid the house and arrest everyone. Toby is now in the low end of witness protection and is now traveling around in a convert school bus–the short kind.
Other stories are:
“Meet Mack Daddy”.  A night of fishing turns into an accident that gives Toby a life-long pet alligator.
Fester’s Woe-Man Troubles. Sometimes, true love isn’t worth the price.
Tucker and The Funeral Home Salesman. An orphaned mutt endears himself to the lady of the house by attacking a funeral salesman.
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Toby Nomad


After ratting out his friends, Toby Nomad found himself on the low end of witness protection. Along with his trusty companion, Mack Daddy, he lives in a converted school bus and can be found camping out in Walmart parking lots. If you see him tap on the door and say, “Howdy”. Be careful, Mack Daddy gets grumpy.

Here’s his website.

Speed Datin’. Five bachelors try speed dating in their search for true love. Only one succeeds.
Gas Crisis. A flagellant mule blows up a moonshine still.
Although there is no profanity, these stories aren’t for the easily offended. The language mistakes are all intended. It’s part of the fun.



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